Day 253: Boyhood

It wasn’t a traditional upbringing
There was no Dad to lead the way
We made the rules as we went along
Following her who was learning the ropes herself
She did her best and it was more than enough
(I would figure that out much later)
I never played catch or learned how to break in a glove
There was no one there to cheer me on at little league games
(I don’t think I would have enjoyed them anyway)
There were no camping trips or heart to heart talks about life and women
He simply wasn’t there long enough to affect change
Or so I thought for the longest time
For absence and need tend to be great purveyors of lessons delivered
The transition from baby to boy to man is difficult enough
Why would God put obstacles on our path and diminish the experience?
So I derived learning from the little I remembered
His love of a good Bolero fostered my love of music
His affinity for numbers fed my mathematical skill
His love and tempestuous relationship with my mother ingrained me with passion
His absence taught me to listen to my inner voice and gut
His departure allowed me to embrace loss and build strength of character
His memory helped cement the building blocks of the mold that would make me my own man
Self-made and self-delivered I like to refer to myself
Off the beaten path, still I made it to my destination
But I can’t take all the credit for the journey
Because she was there and had much influence
Because he was not, and had much influence too
Because others came in at the appropriate times with tidbits of influence as well
Because I met the other her who put her own finishing touches on me
Multiple directors in the production that was to be me
Shining a single spotlight
On the man I am today
This morning
Remembering the how that got me here
My boyhood
Off the beaten path



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