Day 271: The Vow

As we gear up for my Goddaughter’s wedding in November, the subject of writing one’s own vows popped into the conversation last night. Having not written my own, almost twenty five years ago, I wondered what I would have said then, rather than now.

Then:

I am so happy this day has arrived. I love you very much and I want to spend my life with you. You are the person who makes me whole.

And while I would have said those things and meant them, I’m not sure I would have delivered them with the depth of feeling and from the vantage point where my words would flow today. Experience, coupled with the reality of a life shared, would clearly change what I would write today.

Today I would say:

This day is here
And it is but a day
Just one of the many I hope to share and live with you
I know that I love you
But this emotion I feel for you will clearly not sustain us through life’s trials
This love will have to grow, as no doubt it will, with every step we take together
Amassing tidbits of affection to present to one another in those times where challenges prevail
I want you to be the mother of my children, if it is God’s will that children crowd our home’s halls
If it is not His will, then we will embark on a mutual journey where we will lavish this love on the children of our friends and family
We will find a line to parenting together, whether direct or indirect, but we will take this journey as one
I want your family to see me as their own and I want my family to see you as their own, erasing those lines of law that define our roles
I want it to be not that we are their family, but that they are ours
Our branch of the family tree should be strong enough to serve as example in the garden of life where it resides
I want us to be lovers and friends, wholly devoted to one another, bonded with an immeasurable respect that will transcend time
And I promise that I will never forget my role
And in times that I do, that you will remind me
How you led me to this place of quiet, that is my life
How I followed you to this place of promise, that is my future
How we will move to this place of love, that is merely us
Effortless, complete and ever-changing
And on this day and before all present
I needed you to know
This is how I feel
This is my vow
And I love you

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